I write these thoughts on a blank paper. The paper represents my mind, once white and pure now covered in black. I'm just trying to find a way back. because I cant seem to find the way that I was supposed to take. sometimes I just feel fake because every time I get tempted I fail, without fail. Every time I look inside my chest it's empty, it's empty. There's nothing inside of me. my heart beats and the blood just fills my mouth. and every time I try to speak the blood just runs out. I'm choking on all my words and drowning in all my sin and its the way that its been. I cant seem to find a way to change it. Is this how I'm supposed to live? Is this how i'm supposed to be?